What is the first thing you think of when someone talks about networking? Chances are it’s schmoozing – or something similar it. You’re likely picturing a room full of hollow, exaggerated business people all looking to push their own agenda, passing out business cards like they were Halloween candy and uttering phrases like’ Let’s do lunch.’ Good news! Those days are long gone.

Networking today is about building positive win/win relationships.  It operates according to the ‘Law of Attraction’ and focuses on putting others before yourself.  Modern networking is consistent and persistent, truly a lifestyle rather than an activity. Those who know how to network well make more friends and tend to lead more fulfilling lives. This is because these days networking never need-based. When you try networking only when you need new clients you will come off as shallow and desperate. This kind of ‘trolling for contacts’ feels smarmy. Why would anyone feel like they wanted to help bring you new business? Today’s networking is more about giving than taking.

Contrary to popular belief, networking is NOT about who you know. Rather it is about who knows you. So be memorable – in a good way. Talk real, act real, BE REAL and you will find others do the same.  Consider this; you can make more friends/clients in 2 months by showing interest in other people than you can in 2 years of trying to make people be interested in you.

I’m sure you can think of someone you know who is a master networker, they seem to effortlessly connect people who can help each other out. These people understand that the best way to get more referrals is to give more referrals. They also live by these 2 ideals.

GIVE WITHOUT EXPECTATION – This means you do something for someone not expecting to get something back, but rather to simply help them reach their goal. Always remember to help others first. And secondly RECEIVE WITHOUT EVER FORGETTING.

Here are NINE NETWORKING NUANCES that you need to put into place to help you become a networking genius.

1. Smile a lot – Be friendly first, everything else will fall into place. This means being kind to yourself as well. No self-put downs. Practice affirmations in the mirror if you need to.
2. Always be transparent – in all your communications. Have no hidden agendas. Nothing to hide.
3. Show genuine interest in others – BEFORE you expect them to show a genuine interest in you. Give them you undivided attention. Also, try to make them smile with a heart-felt compliment, joke whatever, within the first 30 seconds of talking to you.
4. Focus on ‘what can I do for you’ – rather than ‘what can you do for me.’
5. Everybody deserves to be treated with dignity and respect – this includes assistants, waitresses, janitors, even people who are not nice to you or that you’re feeling a bit miffed at. Always remember every single human being that you encounter throughout the day is more than they appear to be and deserving of unconditional love.
6. Your ability to look someone in the eye – is a tell-tale sign of your own self- respect. A friendly gaze will do. Shifty eye’s say you are untrustworthy while a piercing stare is just plain uncomfortable! Make the effort to ‘listen with your eyes as well as your ears’.
7. 90% of all success is showing up prepared – There is no such thing as being over prepared, so do your homework! Showing up under prepared is a recipe for embarrassment.
8. When someone asks, say what you do…hint – it’s not your job title – Let’s pretend you make a living selling cosmetics. You could say something like ‘I help women feel better about the way they look and I choose to that by teaching them how to use (ABC company) cosmetics. You get the idea. Think about what it is that your work is providing for people. That is what you really do. Cool huh? Now start discovering more about the person you are talking to and what connections you have. Trust me this is way more fun than it sounds!
9. STAY IN TOUCH – This is more important and ultimately more valuable than making the initial connection.