Being able to hold a conversation is a fundamental skill for business and personal expression. If you ever watch classic films and compare the language to a movie made today it will be quite apparent that our vocabulary is shrinking. What’s the big deal you wonder? Well – the fact is people draw conclusions about you every day by the words you choose. They will judge your intelligence, social status, how educated or capable you are, they’ll decide if you are engaging…or boring.
Words are powerful; we use them to express our feelings, convey information and share our opinions. The words we choose have the power to lift someone up or shut them down, make them feel connected to you or shunned by you, words can lift someone’s spirit or crush it. Everyone on earth communicates in some fashion; what are your words telling people about you?
Not having the words to express what you really want to say can hold you back in your career and damage your relationships. Being an excellent conversationalist will make it easier for you to not only show the world your unique personality, but be able to talk to anyone, anywhere and be a person that people are always happy to talk to.
Tips to improve your vocabulary:
Read more – Doing a lot of reading will expose you to other peoples ‘voices’ notice the words they choose and how they make you feel. If you don’t know what a word is – look it up. Reading many different authors will give you some idea of how you would like to come across to others.
Try a little writing of your own – Writing will help you organize your thoughts. So journal (which we used to call it keeping a diary) keep to-do lists, write letters…or the ‘great American novel’. Writing things down when you are feeling angry will keep you from saying things you’ll regret later. Putting it down on paper helps you get your feelings out so that you can hold a (much more helpful) civilized discussion.
Don’t be afraid of what others think – Realize the fear of being judged is nothing more than the fear of the unknown. We are really good at creating scenarios in our mind and freaking out over them. The thing is none of these scenes that have been making us a nervous wreck have actually happened! They are nothing but mind games we are playing with us. The next time you are nervous about having a conversation with someone tell them you are having trouble expressing yourself and ask for their help. People are rarely critical when they are trying to help you through something. This is a great way to get over your fear of someone’s judgment.
Ask questions – Asking questions is an easy way to express yourself. Why? Because asking questions naturally allows you to interact with others. They will share with you their thoughts, feelings, experiences and opinions. This in turn will help you to express yourself to them.