We all get them from time to time…the customer who feels the need to complain. Let’s face it – whether the customer is angry or not when you are the person they are complaining at, you feel attacked, uncomfortable it’s generally unpleasant. Their bellyaching saps your time and energy and taxes your attitude of goodwill.

But if we think about it, there is an upside to the complaining customer. After all if a customer really disliked your business they would simply leave quietly and never return – and perhaps bad-mouth you to everyone that will listen. But instead they have given you a hidden gift, if you’ll be open to accepting it…a chance to make things right and do better in the future. Of course the customer isn’t going to actually tell you this; you’ll have to see this opportunity knocking all on your own.

Here’s how to turn a complaining customer into a loyal customer:

Shut up and listen – I know you’ve heard this before but seriously, let these people vent. They really want to be heard. So hold onto your suggestions until they are done talking, let them get it off their chest and out of their systems. By then you’ll have a good grasp of what’s really bugging them instead of jumping in with solutions before customer is ready to hear them.

Ask the right questions – Is there anything more aggravating than passionately speaking what’s on your mind only to be answered with a script? Grrr! Learn what is at the heart of the scripts you learn in training – and then burn them. No one wants to talk to a robot.

Show ‘em you care – You can almost always get where the customer is coming from so let it show. Customers can sniff out fake concern and it smells of contempt. As human beings we’re hard-wired to be empathetic toward other people. However be aware of the difference between empathy and sympathy, take care to not get overly involved with your customer’s emotions. There’s a lot of middle ground between robotic Rodney and sobbing Sally.

Don’t get defensive – This can be tricky, especially while your customer is in the venting stage of the complaint process. Keep in mind that they may not have the emotional intelligence to complain without being in assault mode. Even if they shout and behave badly don’t take it personally. Stay calm no matter what. A sincere ‘I’m sorry, tell me what happened’ can go a long way towards a happy resolution.

Focus on a positive solution – Once they’ve had their say and you’ve identified the problem it’s time to offer up solutions. Start by asking the customer what they want to see happen. Even if company policy doesn’t allow you to accommodate their request it’s imperative that you stay positive at this point in the game by focusing on what you CAN do for the customer rather than what you CAN’T.